Is 3ds Max Crashing when you use CTRL+V to instance it or it's just not working?
If it's crashing this may be related to an intermittent bug that seems to be related to a problem with the Max SDK. We're trying to find a workaround. As a solution in the meantime you can make an object instanceable by Using Ctrl+V first to make a copy (you can delete this afterwards is you want), and then Use Ctrl+V to Instance. Alternatively holding down shift while you you move the object also works.
I hope that helps,